


Aren't You Happy for Andi?

by ChibiSunnie



Category: Andi Mack (TV)
Genre: Figuring out romantic feelings, Filling in the gaps of an episode, Inner Dialogue, M/M, Realizing you're gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-10
Updated: 2018-11-10
Packaged: 2019-08-21 09:02:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16573601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChibiSunnie/pseuds/ChibiSunnie
Summary: That moment when Cyrus realizes he likes Jonah Beck.





	Aren't You Happy for Andi?

I look at the cell phone screen and watch the scene between Andi and Jonah unfold. My brain registers that those two are now a couple, and my stomach sinks in response. My chest tightens and it’s like I’ve forgotten how to even breathe.

“Cyrus!” Buffy calls me out of my trance. “Aren’t you happy for Andi?”

No. Yes. Of Course. Words, say it out loud. “Yes, of course I’m happy for Andi,” I manage to squeak out. But I’m not. I’m not happy at all.

 

***

  
“Aren’t you happy for Andi?” Buffy’s words echo in my head as I walk home.

“Yes, of course I’m happy for Andi.” That’s what I said. But if I’m happy, why have I felt sick ever since I saw them together? Why am I STILL having trouble remembering how to breathe?

Shouldn’t I be happy that my best friend is finally with the guy she’s liked forever? I mean, I am happy for her—it always makes me happy to see her happy. But her face wasn’t the one I was looking at.

Jonah. Beck. That smile he gave Andi was one I’d never seen before. The man is a human beam of sunshine, but he never shone as bright as that moment with Andi. Why did it hurt so much? Is it like when you stare into the sun and your eyes squint because it’s too bright?

It never hurt in this way seeing him with Amber. She was horrible for him. He wasn’t happy. It only hurt thinking that he deserved better.

And of course Andi is better. Andi is great! Who wouldn’t want to be with her?

But I’m great too. I think? Yeah, I am. He said so. He gave me the honorary team t-shirt. We hugged!

That hug. Every hug. I…feel different when I hug him. It’s so much more…electric? Like I get filled with this energy and every part of me goes numb but in an excited way!

Oh no. No no no no no. No, Cyrus, you have a girlfriend. And she’s wonderful—it’s like you share the same brain! That’s soulmate potential right there. Who else enjoys your dinosaur puns and going to the museums like you do?

You two kissed! And it was amazing! Well, exhilarating at least. Is that what kisses are supposed to feel like? Was it just exciting because it was my first? Was it exciting because I like Iris? I don’t have any others to compare it to.

What would kissing Jonah Beck be like?......Okaaay, probably shouldn’t be imagining that…..Shoot. That…that is not the reaction I get imagining kissing Iris. Or actually kissing her.

No. I…can’t be. I can’t feel that way. I don’t like Jonah Beck. I mean, of course, I like him. But not in THAT way. Right? We’re buds, we haaaang. Jonah-ba-bonna and Cy-guy! It’s friendship. Best friends. That’s it, best friendship.

But Buffy and Andi are my best friends…and being with Jonah feels nothing like when I’m with them. Or like when I’m with Iris.

…….

I cover my nose and mouth with my hand, inhaling sharply. My legs feel weak as my whole body is washed over in a combo of realization and dread.

I like Jonah Beck.

**Author's Note:**

> So I wrote this over a year ago, after the season 2 premier ep, but I never posted it. I figure in honor of it being about 1 year since Cyrus came out to Buffy, it’s a good time to share it with the world. ^_^ Also I feel like all of the Jyrus shippers might enjoy seeing something for their ship. I’m team “as long as Cyrus is in a happy, healthy relationship by the end then I’m happy,” but I do really love Jyrus as a ship. (I also really love Tyrus, though--I think both cases would be great and I legit just want Cyrus to be happy). 
> 
> Andi Mack belongs to Terri Minsky and Disney Channel.


End file.
